if you like me you must not know who I am
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
