YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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