it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
