11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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