Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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