That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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