best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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