But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
