i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
