Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
this hospital has no fireball
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Randomize
