Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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