It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
