U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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