You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
