I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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