i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I feel like death gave me a hand job
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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