dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Randomize
