did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
People in love make me want to vomit
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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