Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
