Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
