dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
