May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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