she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
