he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
