OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
bring money and cleavage
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize