"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
