worst night to have a conscience
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
