i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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