R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
