We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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