FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
