omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
