You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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