I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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