I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
