what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize