Me. At least after what I've been through.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize
