Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
false alarm. still invincible.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
