I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize