Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
