Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
