I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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