just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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