I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
That accounts for only three of the penises
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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