"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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