Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
