She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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