he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
