Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
