Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
